


You Belong With Me

by yourfrendlyneighborhoodfangirl



Series: Destiel [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anxiety, Awesome Bobby Singer, Castiel Has Panic Attacks (Supernatural), Castiel has Anxiety, Dead John Winchester and Mary Winchester, Dean Winchester Has PTSD, Destiel - Freeform, Female Lucifer (Supernatural), Friends to Lovers, M/M, Panic Attacks, Parental Bobby Singer, Slow Build Castiel/Dean Winchester, Slow Burn, Teen Castiel (Supernatural), Teen Dean Winchester, They're both a mess, rated teen for cursing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:22:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28159719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourfrendlyneighborhoodfangirl/pseuds/yourfrendlyneighborhoodfangirl
Summary: Castiel Novak was best friends with Dean Winchester for a few weeks when they were ten, before life tore them apart. Now, six years later, Cas finds that Dean has moved back to town. Castiel struggles with his feelings as he tries to get his best friend back, but Dean seems oblivious. Will he ever get the happy ending he so desperately wants?(A sequel to my other fic, Everything Has Changed, but can be read as a stand-alone)(Think of the other one as more of a prequel to this)
Relationships: Balthazar & Castiel (Supernatural), Castiel & Anna Milton, Castiel & Gabriel (Supernatural), Castiel & Meg Masters, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Lisa Braeden/Dean Winchester
Series: Destiel [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1958527
Comments: 20
Kudos: 33





	1. Back To December

**Author's Note:**

> Someone asked for a sequel, and I couldn't resist.
> 
> This fic will probably be a lot longer than Everything Has Changed, so think of that as the prequel to this one. You don't have to read it, but it gives a background to their relationship and it's very cute, so you should give it a read!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mild mentions of anxiety and panic attacks

**C.N.**

Castiel took a deep breath as he slid the beat up shoe box out from beneath his bed. It was almost midnight, and his room was completely dark except for his bedside lamp, which cast twisted shadows across the room. 

The side of the box that was reached by sunlight from his window was a faded pink, almost white, but the rest of the box was a slightly dimmed red. It was crumpled and ripped from years of being shoved aside or attacked by his cat. Scribbled across the lid in black marker in the careful hand of a ten year old were words he remembered writing with tears in his eyes: ‘Memories of Dean’. 

When he had first filled the box, it had been two weeks since Dean had moved and Cas’s sadness had turned to anger. He knew it wasn’t Dean’s fault, that his friend hadn’t wanted to leave, but Cas was ten and lonely and upset. He had shoved everything that reminded him of Dean- pictures, notes, his copy of _The Homework Machine_ , even the project they had done together- into the box and buried in the back of his closet. Eventually his anger faded back to pain, and when he really missed Dean he would take the box back out and look through everything. Until one day Michael caught him looking through the box, and instead of making fun of him like Cas thought he would, his brother gently suggested that he hide the box, because it would only hurt more.

And so the box had been shoved under his bed, left alone except when he cleaned under his bed and a pain would shoot through him like a knife to the heart. The pain dulled over the years, along with his memories of his first friend, and the box had sat unopened.

But now he was sixteen, and the memories had come rocketing back in full color.

It had been a normal day at school. He’d sat through his classes, diligently taking notes. He’d laughed with Baz and Meg at lunch. After school he’d had swim team practice, and the repetitive strokes of the water helped him to de-stress from school. At home he’d showered, sat down for the mandatory family dinner, and done his homework. Around 10:30 he was laying in bed, scrolling through Instagram, when he’d come across a photo that made him stop in his tracks.

The picture was posted by a boy Cas didn’t know, who went to a different school across town. It was a selfie of the boy and a few friends in football uniforms, smushed together into a group, smiling and laughing at the camera. But Cas didn’t care about them. His attention was caught on a boy being reluctantly pulled into the picture, his face only halfway in the photo. But it was a face Cas would recognize anywhere.

Dean Winchester.

Castiel had stared at the picture in shock for what could have been seconds or hours. Finally, he had torn his eyes away from that crooked smile, those green eyes, those freckles, and thrown his phone across the room to keep himself from looking again. And that was how he ended up on the floor, opening the red box.

Hands shaking, Cas reached out to lift the lid from the box. As soon as he glimpsed the first photograph, he was assaulted by memories.

_He studied Dean across the table. His messy hair was a dirty blonde color, and it only got messier as he ran his fingers through it. He had deep green eyes and a light scattering of freckles across his face. When Cas had seen him with the other boys his posture was always relaxed, like he didn’t care. Now he was sitting more straight up, more attentive, and that gave Cas a warm feeling._

_He must had been staring too long, because Dean caught his gaze. “Are we going to have a conversation, or are you just going to stare at me?”_

It was a picture from an instant camera that Cas remembered getting for his tenth birthday. He focused on himself first, his always-messy black hair and missing tooth and thick glasses. Oh god, he had been a dork before he got contacts. But the ten year old in the picture was grinning like an idiot, his shoulders hunched up as he was squeezed by-

_Cas flushed and looked down. “Sor..sorry. Sorry.” He said. Then he turned even redder. He was stuttering a lot around Dean._

_“So, I’m Dean, if you didn’t know,” he ignored Cas’s embarrassment, which Cas appreciated._

_“I know,” Cas said. If it was possible to get more embarrassed, he did. Why couldn’t he say anything right?_

_“Right,” Dean said. “And you’re Castiel.”_

_“You can call me Cas,” Cas said. “It’s easier than Castiel.”_

Dean looked just as happy, if not more. His arm was around Cas’s shoulders, his easy smile that Cas loved wide on his face. Those lips…

_He could feel Dean’s breath mixing with his, and suddenly Dean leaned in-_

“No!” Cas said out loud, maybe a little too loudly. He pushed the memory back; he wasn’t ready to think about that yet.

Setting the first photo aside, he grabbed the next one. It seemed to have been taken by accident, judging by the confused face of the boy who was only half in the picture. A small face with wide brown eyes stared at the camera, and what was presumably his finger covering the rest of the photo.

_“Dean!” A small voice called. A little boy with floppy brown hair and a huge, gap-toothed smile ran over._

_“Hey Sammy!” Dean said, happier than Cas had ever seen him. He ruffled Sam’s hair affectionately. “This is Cas.”_

_Sam looked at Cas, who smiled at him. “I’ve heard a lot about you, Sam,” he said._

_“Dean’s right,” Sam said, tilting his head. “You do talk funny.”_

_“Sam!” Dean admonished, turning red as Cas laughed._

_“I think Dean’s right about another thing,” Cas said. “We’re going to get along great.”_

Next. This one was a little blurry, like it had been taken by someone inexperienced with the camera. The silhouette of two boys, one blonde and wearing a leather jacket, the other hair sticking up and pointing to something on a piece of paper sitting on the table in front of them. Shelves of books in the background placed it in a library. 

_“Go sit at a table, and we’ll be over soon,” Dean instructed Sam when they got to the library._

_“Fine, but I want to sit by Cas!” Sam said._

_“Quit trying to steal my best friend!” Dean replied, shoving him good-naturedly. Sam pretended to pout and went over to the table._

Reaching back into the stack of photographs, Cas’s hand brushed something that crinkled. He pulled out a crumpled piece of lined notebook paper, ripped in half. Scribbled in messy writing were the words ‘Meet me in front of your house at 9’.

_Turning to the street, he saw a figure illuminated under the streetlamp. “Cas!” Dean hissed. “Is that you?”_

_“It’s me!” Cas whispered back, his heart not slowing down one bit._

_“Come on,” Dean said, a bit louder._

_“Where are we going? This is crazy!” Cas said, starting to panic._

_“Cas,” Dean said. “Breathe.”_

_“Breathe, ok, I could breathe if I was safe in my bed!” Cas hissed. His heart was still pounding, and his breath was shortening._

_“Castiel,” Dean ordered. “Look at me.” Cas’s wide, panicked eyes snapped to Dean’s face. “Your parents will not catch you. We will be fine. I promise. Do you trust me?”_

_“Yes, but-”_

_“Do you trust me?”_

_Cas stared at him. “Yes.” His heart started slowing. He trusted Dean. If Dean said they’d be ok, they’d be ok._

Heart pounding as he remembered that night, Cas discarded the note. The next object, a paper copy of a book…

Nope. He couldn’t do this anymore. Cas shoved the box away from him roughly and collapsed on the floor. Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out. 

When he had calmed down, Cas slowly sat back up. He was done with his trip down memory lane. Trying not to glance at anything he picked up, Cas shoved everything back in the box and put the lid on before his heart could speed up again. 

Now, onto the next order of business. He reached across the floor and retrieved his phone. He would take baby steps so he didn’t panic again. Opening Instagram back up, Cas looked back at the photo. Breathe in, breathe out. Checking to see who was tagged, he saw with a pang of disappointment that none of the accounts belonged to Dean.

Next, Cas clicked on the boy who had posted the photo’s profile. Dean didn’t appear in any other pictures. Undeterred, Cas went back to the first photo and clicked on the account of the boy who was pulling Dean into the camera’s view. _Benny Lafitte_ , the name read. Bingo. Right there among pictures of Benny playing various sports, was a picture from homecoming that year. Benny and Dean smiled next to each other, along with another boy and two other girls. Again, Dean wasn’t tagged in the picture.

Cas clicked on the profile of the girl who was clutching Dean’s arm, a sinking feeling in his stomach. _Lisa Braeden,_ her profile read. And then, _Head Cheerleader, Taken._ Feeling more queasy, Cas scrolled down to the first picture. Lisa was kissing the cheek of a boy, who was looking down and blushing, hair in his eyes. Even without seeing the boy’s face, Cas knew.

The world seemed to spin, and Cas’s heart sped up again. “Breathe in, breathe out,” he whispered. “Breathe in, breathe out!” He didn’t know why this was making his panic. So what, Dean had a girlfriend. He was sixteen!  
  


Did he want to find Dean? Yes. Of course. Not believing that he was actually doing it, Cas scrolled back up to Lisa’s profile. With a bravery he didn’t know he possessed, Cas clicked ‘Message’. Quickly, he typed something in and hit send, his heart rate and breathing going crazy. Then he dropped his phone, dove onto his bed, and buried himself under the covers, trying his hardest to disappear.


	2. The Story of Us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first chapter from Dean's POV, so it's not the best because I was still thinking up parts of the story while I did this.

**D.W.**

Another text notification from Lisa popped up, but Dean swiped it away without a thought. He stared intensely at the Instagram profile, willing it to tell him everything he wanted to know. The profile stubbornly remained unchanged.

He had stared at it for so long that when he closed his eyes, the image was burned into the darkness. Not that there was much to remember. Just a name, _Castiel Novak_ , and a profile picture of a bumblebee. 74 followers, 104 following. _This account is private. Follow this account to see their photos and videos._

Dean let out a frustrated sigh. Who had decided private accounts were a good idea anyway? Actually, probably people who wanted to avoid creeps like him. Because what he was doing was definitely creepy.

He clicked back to Lisa’s profile. Cas had found it somehow. So...all Dean had to do was retrace Cas’s steps and eventually he’d find someone else who followed, or was followed by, Cas. Easy, except for the fact that it wasn’t.

Once again, his view was blocked by a text from the real Lisa.  _ Dean? I’m worried about you. _ He sighed again, rolling over on his bed so he was laying on his back. He was being a bad boyfriend. He should reply to her. 

Was it normal to not want to talk to your girlfriend?

He clicked on the notification to see that he had seven missed texts from Lisa.

**Lisa ❤**

dean?

dean, can we talk about what happened?

you left pretty quickly

who’s this castiel guy?

are you ok?

do you want me to call you?

dean? i’m worried about you

Dean typed out another text, lying swiftly.

**Dean**

i’m fine lis 

He knew he was being a douche. He knew he should be able to talk to his girlfriend, that he should  _ want  _ to talk to his girlfriend, but he didn’t and he couldn’t change that. He felt like this was how middle school relationships were: shallow and empty, the two people only ‘dating’ for the image. Everyone else-Lisa included-had moved on to more meaningful relationships, where both people trusted and wanted to be around each other. He seemed to be the only one who didn’t feel the right thing.

It wasn’t that he didn’t like Lisa. He actually liked her a lot. When they first started dating, over a year ago, he had really, really liked her. It had felt like a dream come true when he asked her out and she said yes. And she really liked him back, and had been by his side through everything that had happened in the past year. Except somewhere along the way, Dean’s feelings for her had faded, and now he was stuck.

His phone buzzed in his hand, and he looked down to see a notification from Benny.  _ Lisa texted me and said something was up. Are you ok? _

_ No _ , he typed back, letting out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. At least he could still be honest with Benny. He and Benny had met in detention when they had both been new kids, almost three years ago, and they’d been best friends ever since.

The phone rang as Benny’s picture popped up, and Dean answered it without hesitation.

“Hey, man, what’s up?” Benny asked. He had grown up in Louisiana, and even three years in Kansas couldn’t dampen his southern accent.

“Hey,” Dean said. “It’s been a lo-o-ong day.”

“What’s got Lisa’s panties in a twist?” That was another thing that set Benny apart from everyone else: he texted with correct grammar and punctuation and everything, and he used old-fashioned words like ‘panties’.

“No one has said ‘panties’ in fifty years,” Dean teased.

“I just did,” Benny joked back. God, he wished things were this easy with Lisa. Around her, he always had to worry about saying the wrong thing and upsetting her.

“So back in elementary school I lived around here for like a month, and I had this best friend named Cas. I never saw him again after we moved, but guess who Lisa got a DM from on Instagram?”

“No shit,” Benny said. “That’s cool.”

“Yeah, well, I guess,” Dean said.

“Why don’t you sound excited?” Benny asked. “Seems like a good thing, to me.”

“I haven’t seen him in six years, Benny,” Dean spilled out. “We’re probably both completely different people now. What if… what if he doesn’t like me?” It sounded stupid and childlike when Dean said it out loud, but there it was. The reason he told Lisa to wait to message Cas, and rushed home so quickly afterward.

“You don’t see much making Dean Winchester worry,” Benny remarked. “This guy must have been really something, huh?”

“Yeah.” Dean smiled before he could stop himself. “Yeah, he is.” 

“So did you get his number or anything?” Benny asked. “Did Lisa reply?”

“I may have told her not to,” Dean said sheepishly.

“Dean,” Benny said.

“Benny,” Dean replied.

“Well, what’s his full name?”

“Castiel Novak.”

“Hell of a name,” Benny remarked. “Hold on.” There was a shuffling from his end, and then came the clack of a keyboard. “Okay,” Benny said slowly. “He goes to the other high school, obviously. He’s a swimmer, set a few records. Oh. Ah. Jackpot.”

“What?” Dean asked, cursing himself for sounding so desperate. “What is it?”

“He’s on the track and field team” Benny said slowly. 

“So?”

“So they have a meet on Monday.”

“No,” Dean said immediately. “No, that’s creepy.”

“How else are you going to know exactly where he’s going to be?”

“It’s  _ creepy _ ,” Dean protested.

“It’s not,” Benny argued. “It shows you care.”

“Don’t get all sappy on me.”

“Wasn’t trying to, brother.”

“Ugh,” Dean said. “I mean… maybe. I’ll think about it.”

“You do that,” Benny said. “I got to go.”

“‘K,” Dean said, sitting up. “Thanks, Benny.”

“Call Lisa,” was his friend’s only remark before he hung up.

“Don’t count on it,” Dean muttered, throwing his phone down. He’d had enough drama for the day.


	3. My Tears Ricochet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas tries to distract himself from Dean, but it doesn't work as well as he hopes.

**C.N.**

Castiel loved early mornings; he loved the peace and serenity of the world before everyone woke up and he always felt calmer. He especially loved the moment of limbo between sleep and waking, when you aren’t exactly dreaming but aren’t exactly awake either. This moment was one of the only moments when he wasn’t stressed, he wasn’t panicking, he was just...existing.

He breathed in the calm, content just being there, before he suddenly remembered what had happened the night before. All the pain of remembering Dean and the stress at the fact that he had DMed Dean’s girlfriend came crashing down upon him, tripled by the fact that he had barely gotten any sleep.

Had he really done that? What was he _thinking_ ? What if she wasn’t even Dean’s girlfriend? What if they had broken up? What if Dean didn’t want to see him? What if Dean didn’t remember him? What if Dean didn’t like who Cas had grown up to be? What if Cas didn’t like who _Dean_ had grown up to be?

He needed to see if Lisa had responded, but at the same time he didn’t want to. If he just ignored it forever, would it go away?

The anticipation was too much. Heart hammering in his chest, Cas slid out of bed. His phone was still laying on the floor where he had thrown it the night before. Maybe it was dead, he thought desperately. No such luck; the battery was at 12%.

_Turn on the phone_ , he told himself. _Good. Now open Instagram_. When he opened the app, he released the breath he had been holding. Lisa hadn’t responded to his message. Quickly, he checked the chat. She hadn’t seen it yet either.

Shaking his head, he went to plug his phone in next to his bed. It was just like him to make a big deal out of nothing.

He needed a distraction, to keep his thoughts away from Dean. Luckily, he knew just the people to call. Once the little lightning bolt that told him his phone was charging appeared, Cas quickly closed out of Instagram and opened his messages. He shot a text to his friends:

**Feathers**

Do you guys want to go to the mall today?

**Little Orphan Annie**

Always!

**Demon Spawn**

u kno it

y do u 2 txt in conplt sntces its wierd

**Little Orphan Annie**

Just because you can’t spell

**Demon Spawn**

i cud if i wantd 2

***Jazz Hands***

u just do that to annoy anna

of course, I desperately need a shirt to go with these AMAZING pants i found the other day

**Demon Spawn**

if u by anthr v neck i swear to god…

***Jazz Hands***

ur just saying that because you cant resist me

**Demon Spawn**

in ur drms gay boy

**Little Orphan Annie**

What time should we all meet?

***Jazz Hands***

i am shocked, hurt, appalled, that my best friend would use my sexuality against me

**Feathers**

I thought you said I was your best friend? Last week at lunch?

**Demon Spawn**

only bcuz he needed ur math hw

***Jazz Hands***

the betrayal never ends

**Feathers**

I’ll pick you up at ten, Anna

**Demon Spawn**

im nt even out of bed yt!

**Feathers**

See you all soon!

Cas shut his phone off, smiling at his friends. One thing was for sure, they never failed to cheer him up.

* * *

  
  


“Hey, Cas!” Anna said cheerfully as she slid into the front seat. Anna was the youngest of the group and not sixteen yet, so Cas usually drove her everywhere. She didn’t go to the same school as him, Balthazar, and Meg, but she moved in down the street from Cas when they were twelve and their families went to the same church, so they had become fast friends.

“Hey,” Cas said, pulling out of the driveway as she put her seatbelt on. “How was your week at school?”

“Oh, you know, same old stuff,” she said. “I aced that history test, though, thanks for helping me study! How’d you do on the spanish quiz?”

“One hundred percent!” Cas reported. “Like my parents would expect any less.”

“Have they been hard on you about your grades lately?” She asked, concerned. “I mean, more than usual?”

“Not really,” Cas said, uncomfortable as he always was when he talked about his family troubles. “Anyway, what’s up with your friends at school?”

Luckily, Anna didn’t press him any further and accepted the subject change. They chatted about their weeks for the rest of the ride and soon they were pulling into the mall parking lot.

“Can you text Baz and Meg and ask where they are?” Cas asked her.

“Already did,” Anna replied. “Baz is waiting for us at the north entrance and Meg is late, as usual.”

“Is she at least out of bed?” Cas groaned.

“Better,” Anna whispered dramatically “She’s already showered.”

“Are you sure you have the right Meg?” A voice called from outside the car. They turned to Balthazar leaning against the driver side window. “Our Meg wouldn’t be caught dead arriving any less than half an hour late.”

“Hey Baz!” Anna said, opening her door to get out. “Come on Cas, hurry up!”

“We don’t need to hurry anywhere,” Cas reminded them, but he got out of the car. “Meg won’t be here for a while.”

“She’s moving faster than usual,” Baz said. “I need to buy my shirts before she gets here! And I need a minimum of twenty minutes to do that.”

“It’s one shirt!” Anna said.

“One shirt for a normal person is ten for Baz,” Cas smiled.

“It’s not my fault they’re on sale! Now come on!” Balthazar ordered. They headed into the mall, and he led them to his favorite store.

Baz and Anna quickly pulled out a bunch of shirts, each one with either a wild pattern or a neckline so low, Baz would never be allowed to wear it to school. He tried on shirt after shirt, both of them being more critical than Cas thought necessary. At least he didn’t have to participate; he just had to sit on the bench and give his opinion.

“What about this one?” Balthazar asked for what seemed like the hundredth time. He stalked out like he was on the runway, then twirled around.

“Hmmm, too crazy,” Anna said. “It would never work with the pattern on those pants.”

“Never work for a regular person,” Baz corrected. “But for a fashion icon like me…”

“Even you couldn’t pull that off,” Anna argued. “What do you think, Cas?”

“Oh, uh,” Cas tried to come up with something that wouldn’t insult Baz. “It’s uh, interesting.”

“That means he thinks it’s ugly,” Anna said.

“If he thought it was ugly, he would say it’s ugly!” Baz countered.

“He just doesn’t want to hurt your feelings,” Anna explained.

“Something you seem to have no problem doing!” 

“Cas?” Anna whirled on him. “It’s ugly, right?” Both of them stared at him expectantly, somehow glaring at each other at the same time.

“Um,” Cas started. He really didn’t want to get in a fight between his friends, _especially_ one about fashion. He vividly remembered the time Anna and Balthzar didn’t speak to each other for almost a month over a disagreement about what they would wear to the school dance (the dance hadn’t been for another four months).

“I got you,” a voice purred in Castiel’s ear, and he sagged with relief. “Baz, if you wear that I will never speak to you again. Anna, stop being a bitch; if he wants to embarrass himself, let him.”

“Meg!” Baz groaned. “You hate everything I wear.”

“I’m just telling the truth, darling.”

“Only twenty-five minutes late?” Anna gasped. “That must be a new record!”  
  
“I think we should get pretzels to celebrate,” Cas said quickly.

“I agree with feathers,” Meg said. 

“I’m not done shopping!” Baz protested. 

Meg grabbed a random shirt out of the large pile and threw it at him. “You are now.”

They managed to drag Balthazar out of the store, after Anna promised they could check out his second favorite later and Meg threatened to attack his new pants with scissors. Ten minutes later, Cas had a warm, cinnamon pretzel.

Anna sighed. “These are the best.”

“Agreed,” Cas mumbled with his mouth full.

“You two are moaning so much it sounds like...well, you know,” Meg winked. They both ignored her, used to Meg’s comments. When they first met, Anna was either infuriated or scandalized by anything Meg did, and Meg enjoyed winding her up. Surprisingly, they became good friends- though Meg still enjoyed making Anna mad.

“Let’s go,” Baz said impatiently. “You can eat outside the store. I need to shop!”

Meg rolled her eyes. “Your overpriced shirts will still be there in five minutes.”

“You never know!” Baz protested.

“We can go,” Cas said. “But can we stop at the bookstore?”

“Yes!” Anna said. “There’s this book that just came out, and I need it!”

“Nerds,” Meg muttered. “We can go there after the diva is done shopping.”

As they made their way across the mall, Cas caught sight of a blond head and his heart skipped a beat. Could it be..? Then the man turned, and Cas scolded himself. He had been doing so great at not thinking about Dean!

No matter how hard he tried or how crazy his friends got, the thought of Dean was always lurking in his mind, just below the surface. For the next hour, Cas thought he saw his old friend no less than seven times. And every time, he got excited.

Anna and Meg separated to go look at something else (Cas wasn’t paying attention as he was focused on a blond man who was looking at toilet seats- in hindsight, maybe he should have known it wasn’t Dean) and Cas was left with Baz. He tried to focus on his friend, but he really didn’t care which shade of blue Baz’s socks were.

“You’re no help!” Baz finally cried in exasperation. “Can you go find Anna; I need her.” Cas was all too happy to comply.

He was wandering the store, looking for the girls, when a familiar name made his ears perk up.

“...Castiel Novak?” A girl’s high voice was saying. Cas frowned; it didn’t sound like Meg or Anna. Maybe they had run into someone from school? He turned, looking for the person speaking.

“Castiel?” A male voice said, sounding shocked. Cas was now thoroughly confused. “Castiel Novak, are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure Dean,” the girl responded, and Cas’s heart stopped. He didn’t hear what she said next, because the blood was rushing in his ears. Dean. Dean. _Dean._

“He… he said he was looking for me?” The boy said. It was Dean, wasn’t it? The girl was talking to _Dean._

“Said you were an old friend, and he wanted to know if I could put him in touch with you. Those exact words, I’m not making it up. I thought it was weird, for someone who claimed to be in high school to talk so formal.”

Cas could hear the smile in Dean’s voice as he said, “That’s Cas for you.”

“Cas?” The girl asked, and Cas realized it must be Lisa. “You really do know him?”

“Yeah,” Dean said. “Yeah, I knew him.”

“So what do you want me to say? Should I ‘put him in touch’ with you?” Lisa joked. 

“No,” Dean said, and Cas froze. No. _No._ Dean didn’t want to see him. He didn’t even want to talk to him. Dean probably had realized that Cas had been a weirdo. Or maybe he remembered…

_They had been close before, like the night they curled up together and watched the stars, but Cas had never felt this close to Dean. He could feel Dean’s-_

Tears sprang to Cas’s eyes. Dean thought he was a freak. Dean didn’t want to see him. They had been friends for a few weeks when they were ten, and Cas was stupid to think that it meant anything more. Dean had probably just wanted to forget about him, until Cas had contacted his girlfriend, foolishly hoping that maybe…

Cas hurried to the bathroom as the tears cascaded down his face. He hoped Dean and Lisa hadn’t seen him, but even if they had, it didn’t matter. Dean wouldn’t recognize Cas after so many years, just as Cas didn’t recognize the stranger who had said ‘no’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh, Baz and Meg and Anna were just as fun to write as Cas's siblings back in Everything Has Changed, if not more! I really love their dynamic.
> 
> Poor Cas :( I hope things get better with Dean...what kind of monster would make things complicated and painful for them? Heheh...oops


	4. I'm Only Me When I'm With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas's friends and brother cheer him up.

**C.N.**

Castiel was quiet and subdued for the rest of the day. His friends seemed to notice his mood, though they couldn’t figure out what changed it. Anna and Baz knew him well enough to leave him alone, but Meg was Meg and she continued to pester him. After she asked “Gee, Feathers, who killed your dog?” for the fifth time, Cas lost it.

“Why can’t you leave it alone?” he shouted a bit too loudly. Nearby people turned and stared.

“Alright, Cassie, alright,” she said, holding up her hands in a ‘I surrender’ position.

“Why don’t we call it a day?” Anna suggested. “I’m getting tired.”

“Good idea,” Baz said, sounding relieved. 

“Peace out, motherfuckers,” Meg said, and she and Baz disappeared.

On the ride home Anna kept trying to start a conversation, to no avail. Finally, she gave up and they drove home in an uncomfortable silence. Cas barely noticed; he was too busy thinking about the conversation he had overheard. 

Dean had seemed happy when Lisa first mentioned Cas. “That’s Cas for you,” he had said, and Cas could’ve sworn he was smiling. So why didn’t Dean want to talk to him?

“Cas,” he distantly heard Anna say. “Castiel!”

“What?” Cas asked rather rudely, snapping out of his thoughts. 

“You drove past the entrance to our neighborhood!” She sighed. “I don’t know why you’re in a bad mood, but I would appreciate it if you would quit taking it out on me. And Meg, earlier. We’re your friends; we just want to help.”

“I’m sorry,” Cas said, turning around and entering the neighborhood. “I- I have a lot on my mind.”

“Duh,” Anna smiled. “But you should apologize to Meg. Even when she’s annoying, she’s trying to help you.”

“I know,” Cas said. “I’ll text her.”

“Knowing Meg, she might pout for a few days before she forgives you.”

“I’m used to it.” He pulled into Anna’s driveway.

“Well, even with you being all moody it was still fun,” she said, getting out of the car. “Thanks for the ride.”

“No problem,” Cas replied.

“Oh,” Anna said, hesitating. “Call or text me, if you want to talk about it, ok?” 

“I will,” Cas said, knowing he wouldn’t. “Thanks, Anna.”

Once he was back home, he headed straight to his room. His mom was doing laundry, his dad was at work, and his brother, Gabriel, was nowhere to be found, so he managed to escape upstairs without anyone noticing.

Collapsing onto his bed, he took out his phone. He texted Meg a quick apology (‘Sorry I snapped at you’), ignored the notification from Instagram, and shut off his phone without checking anything else. Then he tiptoed down the hallway and stole a bag of chocolates from Gabe’s room, where he thought they were hidden, and grabbed his laptop. 

Curling up in the blankets on his bed, chocolate in hand and Netflix pulled up, Cas settled in for a pity party.

* * *

His gloomy mood continued throughout the weekend. He barely spoke at family dinner- not that he usually did, his parents did most of the talking-and managed to avoid Anna at church the next day. On Sunday afternoon he quickly finished his homework and then lay in his room, listening to music and trying to think about anything and everything except Dean.

Obviously it was working perfectly.

His music was so turned up so loud that he didn’t hear the knock on his bedroom door. His brother came bursting in anyway.

“Get up,” Gabe commanded, shutting off the music.

“Hey,” Cas protested weakly from his place on floor.

“Might want to head outside,” his brother continued, ignoring him. “Your friends will be here any minute.”

“I’m not going to,” Cas muttered, then everything Gabe had said sunk in. “Wait, what?”

“You’ve been acting like you just went through a break up all weekend, and then Anna texted me that you were ignoring her.”

“I’m not ignoring her-”

“You haven’t answered any texts or calls from her since Saturday morning. Or Baz, or Meg.”

“Snitch,” Cas said under his breath.

“So, as payback for stealing seven of my favorite chocolates…” Cas cursed. “And because I’m the best big brother ever, I invited your friends over.”

“Damnit Gabe!” Cas shouted.

“Shush, do you want Mom and Dad to hear you?” Gabe said, serious for once. “Anyway, you’re welcome.” He bounded out of the room.

Cas groaned and rolled over on the floor. He couldn’t avoid his friends when Gabe had _invited them over_. Though ‘invited them over’ wasn’t exactly the word for it. Technically, the only friend he was allowed to ‘have over’ was Anna. His parents didn’t approve of him being friends with Meg and Baz. Baz because he kissed boys, wore makeup, and painted his nails and Meg because she cursed and wore ‘revealing’ clothes (though his mother offered far worse descriptions) and smoked.

“Hello, Mrs. Novak!” Anna’s voice rang out downstairs.

“Anna, how good to see you,” Cas’s mother said. “I didn’t catch you or your mother at church today,” she said in her disapproving tone.

“You know how it is with little kids,” Anna responded smoothly. She was _very_ good at handling Cas’s mother. “The twins were acting up today and we didn’t want to disturb anyone, so we left as soon as mass was over.” Anna had a little brother and sister who were eight.

“Oh yes, I remember when my own children were that age,” Cas’s mom sighed wistfully, as if remembering better days. “Well, I’m sure you’re here to see Castiel. He’s up in his room, I’m sure. That boy never gets out. You know, when I was his age I had many friends and I was always…”

“Thanks,” Anna said quickly, and rushed up the stairs. “I know you’re in there, Cas!” She called down the hallway. Cas could hear her getting closer, and he quickly sat up and dashed to his desk. He sat in the chair and grabbed the nearest pen just as Anna entered the room.

“Oh, hey Anna,” he said, pretending to write something in a notebook. “What are you doing here?”

“Don’t insult me, Cas, I’m not stupid,” Anna glared. “Come on, Baz and Meg are waiting in my backyard and you know what happens when they’re left unattended. Do you want another repeat of the trampoline incident?”

“Fine,” Cas sighed, getting up. “I’m coming.”

They found Meg and Baz bouncing on Anna’s trampoline with the twins. Anna’s mother was less strict then Cas’s and so she let Meg and Baz come over, and Anna’s little siblings loved them.

“Anyone under the age of ten needs to go inside!” Anna shouted at them.

“Awww,” the twins cried in unison.

“Leave,” Anna commanded. They stuck their tongues out at her and dashed inside.

“Fun sponge,” Baz pouted at Anna. She stuck her own tongue out at him.

“Can we go in your treehouse, Feathers?” Meg asked, blowing a bubble with her gum.

“If we’re careful that my mom doesn’t see,” Cas said. “She shouldn’t, but you never know.”

“Don’t worry,” Baz said, climbing down from the trampoline. “We’re ninjas.” Then he fell and hit the grass with an “oof!”

They snuck over to Cas’s yard, sticking behind the bushes. Baz and Anna did some dramatic ninja rolls while Cas hummed the _Mission: Impossible_ theme and Meg rolled her eyes at them.

Finally they climbed up into the treehouse. It was a bit cramped, and Cas, the tallest, had to duck his head, but they all managed to crawl inside. 

“So,” Meg said, turning to Cas. “Spill.”

He bit his lip, trying to decide what to tell them. “It’s a long story….” he started.

“We’ve got time,” Anna said pointedly. With a sigh, Cas told them everything, starting with his friendship with Dean six years ago all the way up to what had happened at the mall. Except, of course, the part where he kissed Dean.

“Wow,” Baz said. “You were not kidding when you said it was a long story.”

“You should have confronted Dean and Lisa right there in the store,” Meg proclaimed. “Do it where they can’t run away.”

“You guys,” Anna scolded. “You’re not helping!”

“I don’t see why you’re making such a big fuss about this guy,” Meg said. “He doesn’t seem like anything special. In fact, he sounds like a douche.”

“Is he cute?” Baz asked.

Cas hoped they couldn’t see he was blushing. “I don’t know!”

“So he is,” Baz confirmed.

“Did you not hear Cas? He plays football. He has a girlfriend. He’s obviously straighter than straight,” Anna pointed out.

“A guy can dream,” Baz sighed.

“I bet he’s the kind of guy who’d punch you if you suggested he’s gay,” Meg added.

“He wouldn’t do that!” Cas protested, feeling oddly protective of Dean.

“It’s always the ones that deny it that end up gay,” Anna said.

“True,” Meg nodded.

“Guys!” Cas spluttered. He was definitely never telling them about the kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise Dean will be in the next one! I couldn't resist adding more of Gabe and Anna, Meg, and Baz. I'm a sucker for family love and friend love, if you can't tell.
> 
> I wanted to post more often, seeing as I have more time since it's break, but I'm technically only supposed to use the computer for school work and my mom is getting suspicious. Like, I-better-hurry-up-and-post-this-because-she's-going-to-come-in-here-soon-and-yell-a-lot suspicious. So I hope I can post again soon, but who knows.
> 
> Thanks you so much to everyone who leaves kudos or comments. It makes my day!


	5. Haunted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so, so sorry. I am so very sorry. I left you hanging for almost a month. In my defense, mental illness is a bitch.
> 
> ANYWAY, I finally wrote another chapter and I am going to write the next one already so I can get back to update on a kind of schedule.

**C.N.**

The next day, Castiel was mercifully distracted by a test (though a math test on a Monday had to be some kind of cruel and unusual punishment) and the fact that he had a track meet after school. In fact, he had forgotten all about Dean when he met up with Meg and Baz for lunch.

“How’d you guys do on the test?” Baz groaned. They were all in the same honors math class, though some of them did better than others.

“I thought it was relatively easy,” Cas said. “I hope it was as easy as I thought it was. Maybe I’m just so bad at it that I thought it was easy and I actually failed the whole test.” His stomach fluttered at the thought of his parents realizing he had failed a test. “Oh no.”

“You’re spiraling,” Baz reminded him, glancing up from his phone.

“Yeah, feathers, you’re smarter than both of us combined,” Meg added, pulling out her own phone.

“Speak for yourself!” Baz protested while typing something.

Meg looked up at him expectantly. “So what were you going to say about the math test?” Baz glared at her and she gave him the closest thing she had to an innocent smile. “Come on, I’m waiting,” she said in a sing-song voice.

“I bet you didn’t do very well,” Baz muttered, avoiding eye contact by checking his phone again.

“And I never do very well. Leave me and my Cs alone.” She frowned at her cell phone, glanced at Cas in a way she probably thought was discreet, and typed something.

“A C? That’s practically a perfect score for you!” Baz cheered sarcastically.

“Shut up, both of you,” Cas said irritably. He was anxious about the test and about the track meet that night, and when he got anxious he got annoyed at everything.

“You’ll do fine at the track meet,” Baz said, reading him perfectly as always.

“My dad said he might be able to make it tonight,” Cas fretted. “What if I mess up in front of him?”

“Your dad always says that,” Meg chimed in. “And he never makes it.”

“But what if tonight is the night he _does_ make it?” 

“Cas,” Baz said gently. “Breathe. No more what ifs.”

“Ok, ok,” Cas said, taking deep breaths while continuing the worry inside his head. His stomach twisted up more, and he stopped taking bites of his food.

Just then, Meg and Baz’s phones lit up simultaneously, as if it were planned. They both looked down at their phone and then exchanged glances with each other.

Castiel had had it. “What are you keeping from me?” He said angrily. “I know you’re texting about something!”

“We’re not, Cas,” Baz said tiredly. He was probably tired of Cas. Tired of dealing with an anxious, paranoid best friend who always thought someone was conspiring against him…

_Except this time I’m_ not _paranoid!_ Cas argued with himself. _They’re keeping something from me!_

_They’re talking about you_ , the voice in his head responded. _They think you’re weird, paranoid, too much work to bother being friends with-_

Cas had had it with that voice in his head. He suddenly lurched from his chair, lunged across the table, and snatched Baz’s phone from his hand.

“Hey!” Baz yelled a bit too loud, attracting attention from around the cafeteria. Cas ignored him and opened his friend’s text messages.

**Little Orphan Annie**

So guess who’s apparently in two of my classes?

***Jazz Hands***

Taylor Swift? 

**Demon Spawn**

my wll 2 live

**Little Orphan Annie**

Very funny.

A certain someone who our dear friend is hung up over.

I gathered some intel.

**Demon Spawn**

ofc u did

***Jazz Hands***

shut up and let her fill us in on the juicy deets

**Little Orphan Annie**

He moved here last year

He’s plays football and he’s dating the head cheerleader, Lisa Braeden

***Jazz Hands***

blah blah cliche cliche

**Little Orphan Annie**

He’s also on the wrestling team

He’s not very smart

He NEVER drinks at parties everyone thinks that’s weird and I agree

**Little Orphan Annie is typing…**

“Guys!” Cas yelled. “Seriously?”

“What, Feathers, I thought you’d appreciate it?” Meg drawled. “Annie’s getting all the info for you. Now you can chase your boy.”

“He’s not my boy,” Cas protested.

“If you’re so mad,” Baz said, grabbing his phone back, “then I guess you don’t want to know anything else Anna figures out, right?”

“No,” Cas said stubbornly, “I don’t.” He stared across the lunchroom, ignoring his friends and trying to be angry.

“Alright,” Baz said slowly. “If that’s what you want…”

“Ooh!” Meg squealed, something she never, ever did. “That’s interesting.” She pointedly looked at her phone. Cas tried to look like he was really focused on his sandwich.

He somehow made it through an entire lunch period pretending to be mad at his friends, even while they made remarks about the “interesting” information Anna sent them. When the bell rang, he got up and headed straight for his next class.

“Hey, Cas, wait up!” Balthazar called from behind him. Cas continued his same walking pace forward.

“Cas, did you hear me?” His friend asked, slowing beside him.

“You’re headed in the wrong direction,” Cas pointed out. “Your next class is that way.” He jerked his thumb behind him, still not looking at Baz.

“Cas, I’m sorry,” Baz said. “I’m sorry we were talking about Dean.”  
  


“I don’t want to talk about it,” Cas said.

“Cas.”

“Baz.”

“Castiel Novak, I’m _sorry_ ok?” Baz said, and Cas softened.

“Sorry,” he said. “I just...Dean…” he couldn’t seem to make a sentence.

Luckily, Baz understood. “I know,” he said gently. “He’s a jerk for not wanting to talk to you. He doesn’t deserve your friendship, ok?”

“I don’t want to talk about him,” Cas said, starting to walk faster.

Baz let out a frustrated sigh. “ _Cas-”_

“Tell Anna and Meg to let it go,” Cas called behind him. He hurried around the corner so he wouldn’t have to hear Baz’s response.

Cas may have told Baz he didn’t want to talk about it, but his brain sure wanted to think about it. He didn’t hear a word any of his teachers said all afternoon. He was so distracted that he even forgot about his track meet, until the announcement came during eighth period, “All track and field members are released for their meet tonight. Good luck!”

Stomach churning, Cas considered going to the nurse as he trudged down the hall toward the locker room. It was too much on top of everything that had happened today. But that would make things even worse, especially if his dad did happen to make it.

He told himself he just had to make it a half an hour more. Once he started running, all his anxieties would vanish. It was the reason he continued to do track, even though he practically had a panic attack before each meet. He could run away from his problems, figuratively and metaphorically.

Changing and warming up was a blur. Hannah, the friendly captain of the team, tried to start a conversation with him but he didn’t hear a word she said. He watched his teammates at their events until finally, _finally_ , it was his turn.

Lining up at the starting line, he took deep breaths and let all his thoughts flow out of him. Dean, his dad, his friends, school, everything was gone. It was just him and the track in front of him.

The horn sounded and Cas took off, feeling better than he had in weeks. He loved running. His lungs blew air in and out, and his heart beat the steadiest it had in days. The warm sun shone down and he was rounding the corner and everything was perfect.

Too soon, it was over, and he had crossed the finish line to cheers from the crowd. He wasn’t sure how he had placed but from the looks of things he had done well. He scanned the crowd for his parents, spotting Baz, Meg, and Anna screaming their heads off and, to his surprise, Gabriel. He smiled at that and continued to search for his parents when something made his heart drop.

He had to be dreaming. He didn’t know if it was a good dream or a nightmare, but it had to be a dream because there was no way that this was real. There was no way that Dean Winchester was sitting in the stands, smiling his perfect smile right. at. Cas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No I don't project onto Cas at all what are you talking about


	6. Fifteen

**D.W.**

“Hey, D-Boy!” Gordon called. “Wait up!”

“How many times have I told you not to call me that, man?” Dean complained, reluctantly slowing down.

“Whatever, Winchester.” Gordon slapped Dean on the back, and Dean let out a small grunt.

“Did you ask him?” Alistair asked, approaching them with Zachariah at his side.

“Ask him what?” Benny asked, coming up behind Dean. Dean relaxed, relieved to have his best friend by his side.

“Yeah, ask me what?” Dean echoed, switching into Tough Dean mode and shoving Alistair.

Alistair laughed and shoved him back. “To celebrate a day of no football practice, we’re all hanging out over by the old railroad tracks after school.”

“You’re coming,” Zach said. He had a way of twisting his words so you ended up agreeing with something you never meant to agree with.

“Didn’t you tell me you had to help Sam after school?” Benny suggested helpfully.

“Yeah,” Dean latched onto the idea. “Yeah, sorry, guys.”

“Aw, man,” Gordon said. “You sure?”

“Your kid brother’ll be fine by himself for one night,” Alistair added. “Come on.”

“Naw, sorry,” Dean said. “I really can’t.”

“You’ll come, right Benny?” Gordon asked. 

“We’ll see,” Benny said in his mysterious way. “Come on, De, we gotta get to class.” They took off, weaving through the crowds of students. Though it wasn’t very hard, as everyone avoided them. It came with the reputation; Benny and Dean hung out with the mean football crowd, so everyone was afraid of them by association. Well, everyone was either afraid of them or wanted to _be_ them.

Dean definitely wasn’t innocent, though. Benny had made it clear in his first week that he wanted no part in the bullying, and he didn’t approve. The others teased him for it, but they excused it as another one of the weird southern things he did. Dean had never been brave enough to speak up, and so he stood by, not participating but not stopping it either.

And he didn’t exactly want to. When they had first moved to this town, John Winchester had promised it would be the last move. He had pushed to Dean to play football, keep his grades up, befriend the ‘cool’ kids. He was part of the reason Dean had started dating Lisa. And even though he was dead now, Dean was still afraid of failing his dad.

He and Benny slid into their seats in math class just as the bell was ringing. “I’ll be passing back your tests from last week,” their teacher announced. “Overall, I’m proud of how well you all did.”

Dean felt a spark of hope. Math was far from his best subject, and he was barely pulling through. He hadn’t studied much for the test last week, as he’d been hanging out with Lisa, but maybe it didn’t turn out as bad as he thought it did.

The teacher handed Benny his test back, and Benny grinned, holding the paper up so Dean could see the bright red B+. Dean smiled back and gave him a thumbs up.

Then his test landed on his desk. On the top was a bright red D- and a frowny face (was that really necessary? Did the teacher really need to rub it in with a frowny face?).

Dean groaned. He’d better pay attention today if he wanted to do better on the next test.

When the bell rang for the end of the day, Dean couldn’t get out of there fast enough. He had to run if he wanted to make it to Cas’s track meet. Unfortunately, Lisa caught him outside of class.

“Dean!” she called. “Wait up!” Dean grimaced before whirling around.

“Hey, Lis,” he plastered on a smile.

“Are you alright?” she asked, her black ponytail glinting in the sunlight. She was pretty; there was no doubt about. Her wide eyes and long legs made him the envy of every guy in the school. Why, then, couldn’t he enjoy it?

“Yeah, I was just shocked,” Dean said, slipping his arm around her waist.

“So who is this Castiel?” Lisa asked. “You’re being very mysterious about it.”

“Nothing mysterious,” Dean said quickly. “Just an old friend.”

“Ok,” Lisa said, giving him a small smirk. “If you say so.” 

He gave her his best flirty grin, the one that pushed away any doubt anyone had about why he was dating the prettiest girl in the school. “Actually, I was just going to see him now. He runs track, and I thought it’d be a good place to meet up, catch up, you know.”

“Yeah!” Lisa said. “Just, I was hoping we could hang out.”

“Tomorrow,” Dean promised.

“Your place?”

“Sure thing.” Lisa reached up to his face on her tiptoes and he quickly kissed her goodbye. Then he hurried across the parking lot to his car. It was his pride and joy, and he affectionately called it ‘Baby’. His dad had loved the car and kept it in spotless condition, and he did the same.

His stomach gave a little flip as he climbed in, as it always did these days. After all, this was the exact car that his dad had been in when he had crashed it and killed himself in a drunken stupor. Dean pushed the thoughts of his dad away; he was already nervous about meeting Cas.

He drove carefully across town, the speedometer barely passing 60mph. Usually he would pick up Sam, but today his brother was going to a friend’s house. Which was lucky, as Dean was free to go straight to Cas’s school. It wasn’t very far, but with Dean’s careful and anxiety-ridden driving, he would barely make it.

Glancing at the clock, Dean cautiously pressed his foot down on the gas, ignoring the panic that spiked through him.


	7. Tell Me Why

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m going to beat his ass,” Gabe said, starting forward angrily.
> 
> Cas quickly grabbed his arm. “No!” He said. His friends and brother all turned to look at him incredulously.
> 
> “Cas, you literally hid in your room for days because of him,” Anna said slowly.
> 
> “Yeah,” Baz said. “I don’t usually encourage violence, but that was so not groovy of him.”
> 
> “I’m going to pretend you didn’t just say groovy,” Meg said. “But I agree. Except the not encouraging violence part, because I definitely encourage violence.”
> 
> “Punching someone would mess up the manicures we did the other day,” Anna pointed out. “Baz, no punching him. Your cuticles have never looked better, and it would ruin all my work.”
> 
> “I’ll punch him,” Gabe volunteered. “I’ll gladly punch him.”

**C.N.**

Castiel took a deep breath, the panic settling back in. Damn him. Damn Dean Winchester. Damn him and his perfect smile and his beautiful girlfriend. Damn his ability to send Cas into a panic spiral just by showing up. And damn Cas’s heart, for being slightly hopeful and fluttery.

Why was Dean here? Cas glanced at the other track and field team to double check, and sure enough it wasn’t Dean’s school. So why would he show up? Why would he be on the bleachers outside of Cas’s school, at Cas’s track meet, smiling nervously right at Cas? Why was Cas’s life such a mess? Why, why, why?

“Go, Castiel!” He heard a voice cheer, and he tore his gaze away from Dean to see his friends gathered at the bottom of the bleacher stairs. Cas made his way over to them, pasting a smile on his face.

“That’s my best friend!” Baz yelled, a bit too loudly for Cas’s liking. “The one who got first place! That fastest kid in town! My best friend beat all your asses!” 

“Shut up, Baz,” Cas muttered, shoving his friend lightly when he got over to them, but he couldn’t shove the smile off his face. A genuine one this time. 

“I’m sorry,” Balthazar whispered into his ear. Cas looked at him and nodded, and Baz broke into a grin.

“You practically flew, Feathers,” Meg drawled. She was smirking her Meg-smile that would have seemed mocking to anyone else, but Cas knew she was proud of him.

“Hey, nice one Cassie,” Gabriel said, coming up behind Cas and ruffling his hair.

“Hey,” Cas protested, flattening his hair down. “Don’t call me that.”

“How about a thank-you, for coming to your track meet? ‘Thank you, Gabe, for supporting me, you are the best big brother in the whole world.’ I know, Cassie, I know I am,” Gabe took a bow, smirking at Cas.

“Thanks, Gabe,” Cas said sarcastically. He met his brother’s eyes, hoping that he was sincerely conveying his gratitude. He really was grateful to Gabe for showing up, when their parents hadn’t. Cas was half disappointed and half relieved at that.

Anna pulled him into a hug as Meg laughed at something Baz had said. Cas had almost forgotten about his panic when he caught sight of a face behind Anna’s bright red hair. Dean was standing a little ways back, almost behind the bleachers, watching Cas with an odd expression on his face.

“Cas, what’s wrong?” Anna asked. Cas quickly glanced the other direction, but it was too late. Anna turned and saw Dean. Her smile instantly morphed into a glare, which was surprising because Anna was a generally nice person and did not glare very much.

“What is it?” Baz asked. He, too, looked a bit shocked at the glare on Anna’s face.

“Him,” Anna growled. Meg raised an eyebrow at Cas questioningly.

“Um,” Cas managed to get out. “Uh…” By now, Meg, Baz, and Gabe were all staring at Dean.

“That’s him?” Meg asked.

“That’s him,” Anna confirmed.

“That’s who?” Gabe asked.

“Dean,” Anna and Meg said at the same time.

“The asshole who doesn’t want to be your friend?” Gabe asked Cas. Cas wanted to melt into the pavement and disappear from the world.

“Yes,” he said in a small voice.

“I’m going to beat his ass,” Gabe said, starting forward angrily.

Cas quickly grabbed his arm. “No!” He said. His friends and brother all turned to look at him incredulously.

“Cas, you literally hid in your room for days because of him,” Anna said slowly.

“Yeah,” Baz said. “I don’t usually encourage violence, but that was so not groovy of him.”

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t just say _groovy_ ,” Meg said. “But I agree. Except the not encouraging violence part, because I definitely encourage violence.”

“Punching someone would mess up the manicures we did the other day,” Anna pointed out. “Baz, no punching him. Your cuticles have never looked better, and it would ruin all my work.”

“I’ll punch him,” Gabe volunteered. “I’ll _gladly_ punch him.”

“No one is punching him!” Cas yelled frustratedly. “Look, I’m going to go talk to him.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to-” Meg started.

“If this goes badly, Meg, you can enact whatever horribly evil revenge plan that you’ve probably been planning to enact anyway.” 

“Are you sure you’ll be ok with this?” Anna asked quietly. “You don’t have to talk to him. You don’t owe him anything.”

“I do, Anna, I have to,” Cas said, his voice shaking. “I can’t leave things the way they are.”

Anna nodded. “We’ll wait here. In case you need us.”

“To punch him,” Meg added. 

“I don’t have time to wait here. I have to get to work,” Gabe said. He ruffled Cas’s hair again. “Good luck, Cassie. Remember what I taught you about punching someone.”

“ _No one will be punching anyone_ ,” Cas said exasperatedly. “Bye, Gabe.” He squared his shoulders, turning to where Dean was standing, looking just as nervous as Cas felt. “Alright.” He left his friends to walk toward Dean, who was leaning against a metal support of the bleachers. His blonde hair was neatly trimmed, his green eyes watching Cas worriedly. He was ridiculously tan seeing as summer had been over for at least a month. 

“Hiya, Cas,” he said in his easy way, his voice not conveying any of his nerves. Cas’s heart beat into a frenzy, and he reminded himself to breathe. _In for four, hold for seven, out for eight. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight._

“Hi, Dean,” Cas said, fidgeting with the edges of his shorts. They sat in awkward silence for a little while. Cas’s head was swirling with everything he wanted to say to Dean. Where did they even start?

“Your friends look like they want to murder me,” Dean said conversationally, nodding to where Meg, Baz, and Anna waited on the bleachers behind Cas.

“Uh, yeah, they kind of do,” Cas said awkwardly. “I mean, they won’t, they’re just mad at you, and they kind of want to punch you, but-” He cut himself off, cursing himself for being so awkward. If Cas thought he had wanted to disappear into the pavement before, now he would have sold his soul to be able to turn invisible.

“Oh,” Dean said. “I think I recognize the red-haired one. She goes to my school, right?” 

“Yeah, Anna,” Cas said. It was silent for a moment more.

“Why do they want to punch me?” Dean asked finally.

“Oh,” Cas said. “Uh…” He cleared his throat. “Uh, just ‘cause I was super nervous and worried about talking to you, and they don’t want me to get hurt.”

“Oh yeah, I remember that you get really anxious. Are you remembering to breathe?” Dean asked.

“Yep,” Cas said. “I’m trying.” 

“Four counts in, hold for seven, then out for-”

“Eight,” Cas cut him off sharply. “I know.” He was mad now, mad that Dean could just show up and pretend to be his friend and pretend to care about him when Cas knew that he didn’t.

“Sorry,” Dean said, shrinking back into himself. “I just- sorry.”

Now Cas was feeling guilty for making Dean feel bad, but he pushed it away. He was allowed to be mad.

He took a deep breath. “Do you want to go for a walk while we talk?” He asked. He figured if he could show Dean around the school grounds, they’d have a bit more to talk about.

“Sure,” Dean said gratefully.

“Let me just go get my sweatshirt and sweatpants. It’s kinda cold.” He turned and jogged back to his friends. They were sprawled across the bleachers in various positions. Baz and Meg were on their phones, but Anna was watching him.

“We’re going to walk around while we talk,” he announced to them.

Anna sat up from where she was laying with her head in Baz’s lap. “Are you sure-” 

“Yes,” Cas said, pulling his sweatpants on and then slipping on his slides. “I’m sure.”

“Do you want us to wait for you?” Baz asked, glancing up at him with a concerned look on his face.

“No,” Cas said. “I’ll drive myself home. I don’t know how long this will take.” Slipping his sweatshirt over his head, he walked back over to where Dean was waiting.

“Let’s go over to the garden,” he suggested. They walked in silence across the grass, Cas staring at his white socks in his black Nike slides. The grass was a little brown, dying from the colder weather.

“How’s your life?” Dean asked after a while. “That was Gabe earlier, right? How’s he doing?”

“Gabe is, well, he’s Gabe,” Cas said. “He’s a senior. Mom and Dad are trying to get him to apply to all these big colleges, but he won’t. He wants to go to art school.”

“Cool,” Dean said. “What about your other siblings?”

“Luci had a…falling out, of sorts, with Mom and Dad. She doesn’t come home anymore, but she’s in school to be a veterinarian and she lives with a bunch of roommates. She’s doing well. Michael’s in law school, and he has this girlfriend he’s probably going to propose to in the next year or two,” Cas paused. “How’s Sam?”

“Still really smart,” Dean smiled. “Kid’s probably going to pass me in school one of these days.” It was silent for a few steps more. “Your parents are still…” he trailed off.

“Strict?” Cas offered, though they both knew it was more than that. “Yep. Is your dad still…”

“He’s dead,” Dean said quietly.

“Oh!” Cas said awkwardly, not sure what else to say. “Um, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah,” Dean said. “It’s weird, because it’s not like he was an amazing father while he was alive, but I still… I still miss him. I’m still… I don’t know. How’s your life?”

Cas went along with the subject change without comment. “Pretty good, I guess. I do track, and swimming. You’ve seen Anna, Meg, and Baz. They’re pretty awesome. Meg and Baz go to my school, and you know Anna goes to yours.”

“They sound awesome,” Dean said. “You already know about Lisa,” Cas’s stomach churned, “and I’m...I’m lucky to have her.” Cas noticed the slight halt in his voice at that, and he wondered what that was about. “My best friend is Benny. I got Sammy. And Bobby; I’ve known him my whole life and he was already like a second father before.”

“That’s good,” Cas said. The conversation was slightly awkward, but not as bad as it could have been. They were steering away from any big topics, and from mentioning their past together, but that was fine with Cas. He wasn’t sure he wanted to get super close to Dean right now. That _no_ still rang in his ears.

After walking around and talking for a little while more, about movies and music and unimportant things, Cas was getting cold in his thin sweatshirt. “Do you want to go somewhere else? We could go get food, or something,” he suggested.

“Yeah,” Dean said. “That sounds good.” They headed back toward the parking lot. “Um, do you want to ride with me? Or do you have your own car?” 

Cas considered this offer. “I can leave my car here and catch a ride to school with Gabe tomorrow,” he suggested. “And then I’ll ride with you.”

“Ok,” Dean agreed, leading Cas to an old car that he recognized. It was the same one Dean’s dad had always driven. It was so old that you would expect it to look beat up, but it was obviously well taken care of.

“Same car,” Cas remarked.

“Yeah, I still got Baby,” Dean said, rubbing the car’s hood fondly. It made Cas smile, the way Dean loved his car so much, and Dean looked up and caught his eye and smiled back at him hesitantly, and the world seemed to narrow to only them. For a second, they weren’t strangers or acquaintances or used-to-be-friends, but just Dean and Cas, together against the world.

Then Cas remembered that ‘no’, and his smile fell. He and Dean weren’t friends. They barely knew each other now. And Cas wasn’t here to make friends with Dean again. He was here to… well, he didn’t know, exactly, why he was here. He was here to clean things up, so he wouldn’t panic every time he saw Dean. He was here to convince himself that Dean was a completely new person now, and they could never be friends again, and maybe then that ‘no’ wouldn’t hurt so much.

But, though some things had changed, Dean was still fundamentally the same person. He was still Dean Winchester, still beautiful, still made Cas’s heart beat like crazy. And all the walls Cas was trying to keep up, so he wouldn’t get hurt again, were crumbling away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I changed all the chapter titles so they're all Taylor Swift songs, because if you can't tell by now I love Taylor Swift. 
> 
> That is all.


	8. Breathe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for a lot of anxiety and a panic attack

**D.W.**

Why, oh, why had Dean volunteered to drive? He didn’t want to leave Baby in a random school parking lot, but that was almost preferable to the current situation. Dean tried to avoid driving with any passengers, Sam being the exception because he knew about Dean’s panic and could calm him. Sweat dripped down Dean’s face, and he prayed that Cas didn’t notice the snail’s pace they drove at.

Cas. Dean could hardly believe that Castiel Novak, after so many years, was sitting in his passenger seat. Cas had been the best friend Dean had ever had, before Benny, and Dean had missed him more than even he had realized. 

Cas looked good. He had run lightning fast, definitely a different person than the awkward pre-teen who stumbled as soon as he took a step. And he was still tall but definitely not skinny and gangly anymore- he had grown into his height and gained a lot of muscle. Some things hadn’t changed, though, like his always-messy hair and his blue eyes, the brightest eyes Dean had even seen.

He had been so focused on Cas that when Dean glanced at the console, he realized that he had been driving almost 75 miles per hour. His pulse sped up as he tried to casually slow the car down. The road was dangerous, and he was not about to be responsible for killing Cas.

The air in the car was tense and awkward. Neither of them had said a word yet as Dean pulled into the parking lot of the coffee shop they had agreed on. He realized that Cas looked as nervous as Dean normally felt while driving. He knew that Cas had anxiety and this was certainly the kind of situation that would make him nervous, but he was hesitant as Cas definitely hadn’t wanted his help before.

It was more than nervousness, though. Something was bothering Cas. Dean turned the key, shutting off the engine, but when Cas went to open the door Dean felt himself reaching out to grab his shoulder. “Cas,” he said hesitantly. “I just- I feel like you’re mad at me, or-or upset, or something, and…” he trailed off, trying to collect his thoughts into comprehensible words.

Cas looked uneasy. “No, why would I be mad at you?” His eyes flashed, and he seemed angry. 

“I don’t know,” Dean said, but he didn’t ease up. “I’m being silly. Let’s go inside.”

  
  
**C.N.**

They got a booth toward the back of the shop. Dean ordered black coffee and Cas got a hot chocolate, because caffeine only made him more anxious. Sitting there was even more awkward than the car ride.

“So, how’s school going?” Cas asked, cringing at the question.

“Good,” Dean said. “You?”

“Good,” Cas echoed.

Now that they were caught up, it seemed they had nothing to say. They weren’t good enough friends to talk about deeper things. Hell, they weren’t even good enough friends to be honest about their grades. 

Their drinks had just come when Dean’s phone buzzed. He gave Cas a guilty look and muttered a “sorry” before getting up and walking outside to take the call. 

“Hey, Lis,” Cas heard Dean say before the door shut. 

Cas blinked back tears. It had been a mistake coming here. Dean had better friends now, he had a  _ girlfriend _ for goodness’ sake; he didn’t need Cas. He played football and probably went to parties and drank and did who knows what with Lisa while Cas sat around playing D+D at Anna’s house. He had been naive enough to think that maybe Dean would want to see him, but he didn’t and Cas just wanted to go home and curl up in his bed and maybe cry a little.

He got up, grabbing his hot chocolate because it was $5 goddamnit and he was a broke high school student. In his haste to get out, he flung open the door and ran smack into someone else.

Hot chocolate went flying and flooded down the front of his sweatshirt. The person he had run into’s phone fell to the pavement with a clatter.

“I’m sorry!” Cas cried. He bent down to grab the hot chocolate cup as the person bent down to grab their phone, and their heads smacked together.

“Shit,” A familiar voice swore, and Cas looked up with dread to see that the person he had run into was the one and only Dean Winchester.

That was the final straw. He had run into Dean and probably broke his phone, and his sweatshirt was soaked with hot liquid and now he was panicking and this was such a disaster he was a screw up why couldn’t he do anything right-

“Cas?” A hesitant voice said. “Cas, breathe, ok?”

Tears were running down his face and he was making such a fool of himself, everyone was probably watching him panic he was crying in public like an idiot sitting in a puddle of spilled hot chocolate and if Dean hadn’t hated him before he sure hated him now he’d never want to be seen with Cas again and Cas had ruined it like he ruined everything he wanted to-

“Castiel, breathe!” Dean ordered. Cas sucked in a shaky breath and things started to swim into focus. He was still crouched in front of the coffee shop, and Dean was in front of him looking more than a little worried.

“Breathe with me, can you do that?” Dean asked. All Cas could do was nod. “Ok, in….hold…..and out…...in….hold…” Cas tried to focus on Dean’s voice. He just had to breathe. That was it. No thoughts, only Dean’s voice helping him through it.

Cas focused on his breathing until his heart rate was slowing down again. Dean sat patiently with him on the sidewalk the whole time, giving anyone who stared to long a sharp glare.

When the panic attack had mostly passed and he was calm- although calm was a relative term, because Cas was  _ never _ completely calm-he wiped his wet face with the sleeves of his soaked hoodie. Dean was still there, sitting so they weren’t touching and seemingly fixated on something in the parking lot, for which Cas was grateful.

“I don’t know about you, but I’m getting cold,” Dean said conversationally, as if everything was fine. “Why don’t we sit in the car? I probably have another jacket in there too; it can’t be much fun to sit in a wet sweatshirt.”

“Ok,” Cas said quietly, his voice rough. Dean led him to Baby, rummaging around in the trunk before emerging with a beat-up flannel shirt. 

“This is all I could find,” he said apologetically, handing it to Cas.

“Thanks.” Cas struggled out of his sopping hoodie before slipping on the soft flannel. It was warm and smelled like motor oil, and Cas tried to not to look like he was enjoying it so much.

They both got in the car and Dean pulled out of the parking lot. They drove in silence, and though it wasn’t as comfortable as it was with Anna or Baz or Meg (though Meg would never let a car be silent) it wasn’t as awkward as before either. Dean kept glancing at him the entire time.

Finally, Dean pulled to a stop by a park. “Do you want me to take you home?” he asked.

“Not yet,” Cas said. He didn’t know why he was still so stupid, but he didn’t want to part with Dean like this. It had been embarrassing, to say the least, and Cas at least wanted to redeem himself before Dean left for good again. 

Because obviously, that’s what was going to happen. Cas had had a panic attack and he had cried over spilled hot chocolate, and Dean, who had already wanted to leave, had had to pick it all up and calm Cas down. No one wanted a friend like that. No one liked someone who did that. 

“I’m sorry,” Cas blurted. He stared out the window so he wouldn’t have to meet Dean’s eyes. “I’m really, really sorry.”

“For what?” Dean said, but it wasn’t sarcastic or mocking. “It’s not your fault you had a panic attack.”   
  


Cas flinched at those words. “It is, though.”  _ Shut up _ , he told himself, but anxiety had taken over once again and Cas was just along for the ride. “I’m stupid for crying and panicking over small things, and you’re being so nice but I don’t deserve it and you already didn’t want to be here anyway but then you had to clean up after me and-”

“Woah,” Dean said. “Slow down. What did you just say?”

And now the tears were coming back and Cas was powerless to stop them. His breath was getting short again and damnit he was  _ not  _ going to have another panic attack in front of Dean Winchester.

Except apparently he was.

He needed to get out of this car. He needed to get out RIGHT NOW.

  
  
**D.W.**

Dean jumped as Cas wrenched the car door open and flung himself out. Dean cursed himself for not being more careful about his words, as it had obviously triggered another panic attack, but he was reeling from what Cas had said.  _ You obviously don’t want to be here anyway.  _ Maybe it had just been the anxiety talking, but Cas had seemed so sure that Dean figured it was something more.

He opened his own door and carefully walked around the car. Castiel was sitting in the grass and breathing heavily, but he didn’t seem to be completely panicking.

Damn. This whole entire night was a mess. Dean had made mistake after mistake, and he had caused Cas to have not one but two panic attacks.

“I’m sorry,” Dean said, sliding down onto the ground next to Cas. “This has been a disaster. And I’m really, really sorry for making you panic.” Cas was silent next to him, taking deep breaths. “And you don’t need to apologize for panicking. I get it. My- my dad died in a car crash, and whenever I get behind the wheel I panic. You might have noticed my very careful and  _ very _ slow driving.”

“You said that I don’t want to be here.” Dean continued. He didn’t know what to do, so he just kept talking. “I do. I really do. I missed you a bunch, more than I realized, and I didn’t really think I’d ever seen you again but here you are. It’s awesome.”

They sat in silence for a little, and Dean found himself looking up at the stars. He remembered that night years ago, when he had found out they were moving and he had been a mess. He’d ran all the way to Cas’s house in the dark, desperate for the comfort of his best friend. He owed it to Cas to him through this.

Dean was engrossed in searching for the constellations when Cas finally spoke. “I heard you,” he rasped. “At the mall, with Lisa. You said… you said you didn’t want to meet up with me.”

What? Dean racked his brain, trying to remember all of the conversation. At the mall..? 

Oh.

He laughed, then immediately stopped himself. “Sorry, I’m not laughing at you. It’s just, you got it all wrong. I wasn’t saying that I didn’t want to meet up with you. I was just nervous. I was scared that I had changed, and you had changed, and things wouldn’t be like they used to be. I didn’t want it to be awkward and ruin all the memories of when we were younger. If that makes sense.”

“Well, it was definitely awkward,” Cas said. “And embarrassing. And horrible.”

“Not exactly…” Dean started.

“Yes. Yes, exactly.”

“Ok, it wasn’t perfect. But at least we’re not strangers anymore.” He leaned over and lightly bumped shoulders with Cas. “It only took a few panic attacks and a heart-to-heart, but we’re back.”

“We are,” Cas breathed. He slowly scooted over until he and Dean were sitting shoulder to shoulder, and Dean’s breath hitched. 

“Are you ok?” he asked.

“I’m still really embarrassed,” Cas said. “Like you said, we’re kind of strangers, and I just broke down in front of you.”

Dean winced at that. “Don’t be embarrassed. Like I said, I get it. And, by the way, what I told you, no ones knows except Sam and Bobby. So maybe I’m the one that should be embarrassed.”

“I won’t tell,” Cas breathed. Oh, God, he had missed that voice. Cas had had an unusually deep voice for a ten-year-old, and now that he had grown into it it seemed to fit him perfectly.

“I missed you,” Dean confessed to the stars.

“I missed you too.”


	9. New Year's Day

**D.W.**

“Dean!” Sam yelled. “Dean! Dean! Dean!”

Dean groaned and opened his eyes. “Go away Sammy, I’m sleeping.”

“You’re  _ late _ !” Sam said, ripping the blanket off of him. “And if you’re late, I’m late!”

“Fine, fine, I’m getting up,” Dean grumbled. He sat up in bed, blinking at the light. Sam was standing by the side of the bed, bouncing up and down.

“Where were you last night?” Sam asked as Dean got out of bed.

“None of your business,” he said, reaching behind Sam to grab his phone.

“Come on, I know you weren’t with Lisa. You looked more like you were out with Benny.”

“What do you mean, I ‘looked like’ I was out with Benny?”

“Well, you know, more relaxed, and...well...happier?”

“I’m very happy with Lisa,” Dean snapped.

Sam held up his hands in surrender. “Ok, ok. So, was it Benny?”

“Nope,” Dean said.

“It  _ was  _ Lisa?”

“Wrong again.”

“Then who was it?”

Dean looked up from his phone and over at Sam. “Remember when we used to live here? When we were younger. With- with dad?”

Sam tried to hide his flinch at the mention of their dad, but Dean could read anything in his little brother. Still, he pretended not to notice. “Yeah,” Sam replied.

“Remember Cas?”

“Sort of,” Sam said. “We weren’t here very long. I just remember going to the library after school with him sometimes.”

“Yeah, well, that’s who I was meeting.”

“Seriously?” Sam asked. “That’s awesome! Can I see him?”

“I thought you just said you didn’t remember him,” Dean accused.

“I didn’t remember him  _ much _ ,” Sam said.

“Yeah, whatever,” Dean said, ruffling Sam’s hair. Sam batted his hand away. “Well, I was thinking of inviting him over here anyway.”

“Yay!” Sam jumped up. “Now, get ready for school. If you make me late, I’ll- I’ll…”

“You’ll what?” Dean asked mockingly.

Sam made a face at him. “If I’m in the car first then  _ I’m  _ choosing the music.” He raced out of the room before Dean could yell at him.

“Bitch!” Dean called after him.

“Jerk!” he heard faintly.

“You’re both idjits!” Bobby yelled from somewhere downstairs.

  
  
**C.N.**

“So, how did it go?” Balthazar asked Cas. 

“Yeah, spill,” Meg ordered.

Cas paused where he was, stopping and leaning against the lockers as he tried to decide what to tell them. “It was...nice.”

“Nice!” Meg yelled. “How was it nice?”

“Oh, come on, you have to give us more than that!” Baz protested.

“How was it ‘nice’!” Meg demanded.

“We talked. A lot. And it was awkward and embarrassing, but altogether nice,” Cas elaborated. He smiled to himself, thinking about how he had woken up cuddled in Dean’s flannel shirt.

“Why are you smiling?” Meg asked.

“Because I had fun!” Cas spluttered. 

“Fun,” Baz said suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows.

“No!” Cas yelled, causing several other students to turn and stare at them. He blushed. “No! We didn’t...he’s not... _ I’m  _ not…”

“Oh, calm down,” Meg said lazily. “You know it’s a joke.”

“Well if you don’t want to do that with him,” Baz added. “I’d be happy too…”

“Baz!” Cas yelled again, lunging to slap a hand over his friend’s mouth. “No! Stop!”

  
**D.W.**

**Benny**

you ever gonna tell me how it went?

**Dean**

its only first period benny i was gonna tell you at lunch

**Benny**

i thought i was your best friend

best friends get to know before everyone else

because if your going to talk about it at lunch then the rest of the team is certainly gonna hear too

**Dean**

right 

well it was certainly interesting

but im happy we caught up and im hoping to invite him over soon

**Benny**

you ever gonna introduce me?

**Dean**

if sam and bobby dont scare him off then ill introduce you next

**Benny is typing…**

_ Briiiiing! _ The bell rang and Dean shut his phone off and slipped it in his pocket, closing the textbook he had been hiding it behind. Whoever had decided first period math class should be a thing deserved to burn in hell.

Benny came up next to Dean as he gathered his things. “So, man, you-”

“Dean?” the teacher called. “Can I talk to you?”

The students remaining in the classroom snickered, but Dean smiled it off. “Sure thing, Mrs. Campbell.” He gestured to Benny to go on without him, and finally they were left in an empty classroom.

“I’m going to say this frankly, Dean,” she said. “You’re going to fail my class.”

Dean froze. “What? No. No, I can’t, I have football-”

“I know,” she said. “I know you need to get your grade up. So, I think it’d be best if you got a tutor.”

“A tutor?” Dean protested. “No, I’m not stupid, I don’t need-”

“What you need is to get your grade up,” she reminded him. “And a tutor would help with that. I’m not saying you’re stupid, you just need a little extra help.”

“I have football practice after school,” Dean said. “I can’t miss it.”

“We can work with that,” Mrs. Campbell said. “This is not negotiable, Dean. I already emailed your...guardian…about it. I just wanted to give you a heads up.”

Dean’s heart stopped. He had been trying to hide his struggles because he didn’t want to disappoint Bobby. He was already a failure to the memory of his real father; he didn’t want to be a failure in the eyes of his father figure too.

“Ok,” Dean said dejectedly. “Thanks, Mrs. Campbell.”

“Have a good day, Dean,” she called after him.

  
  
**C.N.**

“How was your day, Castiel?” his mother asked. The four of them- Cas, his two parents, and Gabriel- were sitting around the table for family dinner. Even while the two remaining kids were in high school and busy with their sports, friends, and homework, family dinners were still mandatory.

“Good, Mom,” Cas responded. He picked at his food. He knew his parents were eventually going to ask about where he had been last night and who he had been with, and it made him nervous. Missing family dinner was not something taken lightly.

“And you, Gabriel?”

“Also, good,” Cas’s brother said. “I totally aced that chem test.”

“Very nice,” their father smiled. There was a bit of silence, except for the clinking of forks against plates, until their father spoke again. “I’m sorry I missed your meet, Castiel.”

“It’s ok,” Cas said. “I got second.”

“I heard,” his dad said. “Does that have anything to do with why you missed dinner and came home late, and why you didn’t even text us about it.”

Cas’s heart pounded. “Didn’t Gabe tell you?”

“He did, but I’m disappointed I didn’t hear it from you,” his mom chimed in. “I expect you to ask permission next time, before going off and doing whatever you want.”

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he apologized.

Naomi nodded. “Now, what was so important that you had to miss dinner for it?”

“I was...I was… I went out with a friend,” Cas started. Should he lie, or tell the truth? He was less likely to get in trouble in he lied, but Naomi could detect a lie a mile away.

“Where? With what friend?”

“I went to that coffee shop on Seventh,” Cas continued. He decided the truth was safer. “I was reconnecting with an old friend. Dean; we were friends for a few weeks in elementary school.”

“Does Dean go to your school?” His mother was relentless. The FBI should hire her to interrogate criminals, Cas thought. She’d have them confessing in minutes.

“No, he goes to the same school as Anna,” Cas explained.

His mother frowned. “Well, I’m still not happy you didn’t tell us where you were going. And I’d like to meet  _ Dean _ before you go anywhere else with him.”

“Is he smart?” Chuck chimed in. “Does he play any sports?” Gabe gave Cas a sympathetic look from across the table.

“I don’t know, and football,” Cas said. He was relieved that he wasn’t being punished, but he dreaded having to bring Dean over. His parents could be brutal. And if they didn’t approve of Dean, they might not let Cas hang out with him anymore.

Cas sighed. His parents seemed to be the root of most of his troubles.


End file.
